The English-to-12-Year-Old-AOLer Translator

Check this site out its just hilarious!!

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How to write a paper in college

1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lit place in front of your computer.

2. Log onto MSN,Yahoo  and ICQ (be sure to go on away!). Check your email.

3. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it.

4. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some chocolate to help you concentrate.

5. Check your email.

6. Call up a friend and ask if he/she wants to go to grab a coffee.  Just to get settled down and ready to work.

7. When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lit place.

8. Read over the assignment again to make absolutely certain you understand it.

9. Check your email.

10. You know, you haven’t written to that kid you met at camp since fourth grade. You’d better write that letter now and get it out of the way so you can concentrate.

11. Look at your teeth in the bathroom mirror.

12. Grab some mp3z off of kazaa.

13. Check your email. ANY OF THIS SOUND FAMILIAR YET?!

14. MSN chat with one of your friends about the future. (ie summer plans).

15. Check your email.

16. Listen to your new mp3z and download some more.

17. Phone your friend on the other floor and ask if she’s started writing yet. Exchange derogatory emarks about your prof, the
course, the college, the world at large.

18. Walk to the store and buy a pack of gum. You’ve probably run out.

19. While you’ve got the gum you may as well buy a magazine and read it.

20. Check your email.

21. Check the newspaper listings to make sure you aren’t missing something truly worthwhile on TV.

22. Play some solitare (or age of legends!).

23. Check out bored.com.

24. Wash your hands.

25. Call up a friend to see how much they have done, probably haven’t started either.

26. Look through your housemate’s book of pictures from home. Ask who everyone is.

27. Sit down and do some serious thinking about your plans for the future.

28. Check to see if bored.com has been updated yet.

29. Check your email and listen to your new mp3z.

30. You should be rebooting by now, assuming that windows is crashing on schedule.

31. Read over the assignment one more time, just for heck of it.

32. Scoot your chair across the room to the window and watch the sunrise.

33. Lie face down on the floor and moan.

34. Punch the wall and break something.

35. Check your email.

36. Mumble obscenities.

37. 5am – start hacking on the paper without stopping. 6am -paper is finished.

38. Complain to everyone that you didn’t get any sleep because you had to write that stupid paper.

39. Go to class, hand in paper, and leave right away so you can take a nap.

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Lu’s guide to naming your engineering college

If you are one among the lucky to have a couple of millions stoved away in a swiss account and you still haven’t given a thought about starting an engineering college in Tamilnadu or any part of south India, you must be a fool.

 

Lately owning an engineering college has become a fashion statement and heck its so profitable that even I’m thinking of starting one when I get a job. No, I am not kidding for any proper analysis into this field will baffle you with its profits and chances to convert your black to white. I’ll save my detailed plans of getting an engineering college running (with help pf gapp ofcourse) and restrict myselves to guiding prospective “vice chancellors” in naming their college.

 

Note : Anyone naming their college according to the following guidelines is liable to pay royalty amount of $4999.95 as per creative geniuses license act of 21-jun-2007.

 

Engineering colleges in TN, if you have noticed are named as per set pattern and what I have done is merely adapt them to present them as a set of rules.

 

Option 1 : Identify your family deity. It’s favorable that the name of your deity is queer enough. After that name the college as <insert deity name here> college of engineering.

 

e.g : Moombabigai college of engineering, raja rajeswari college of engineering, bannari amman institute of technology, andal alagar college of engineering, st. joseph’s coe etc…..

 

Option 2 : Name your college after your mother, father, wife,son,daughter or any relative of yours for that matter. Its also advisable that you combine multiple names to get a really long name. If possible try to include titles like annai,sri etc to your relatives name to get the effect also place of birth of the relative may be added to his/her name.

 

e .g : Annai mathammal sheela college of engineering, ponniyah ramajayam college of engineering, velammal college of engineering etc…

 

Option 3 : Select a great leader, living or dead and name the college after him. It gives a dignity to the college and people are attracted by the name.

 

e.g: Dr.A.P.J.Abdul Kalam college of engineering, Mahatma Gandhi college of engineering etc…

 

Option 4: Simple enough.Name the college after the place where it exists.

 

e.g : Vellore Instititute of Technology, Kongu engineering college etc…

 

Option 5: This I fear is most widely exercised though it doesn’t exist on its own. It is the magic of TLA¹ . Many colleges in TN are named in glorious TLA’s. Its simple enough. The college is named as X.Y.Z college of engineering, where X,Y,Z may be any alphabet. That leaves you with 26×26×26 = 17576 names. Most times these letters serve as an acronym for names got through the above mentioned cases but the rule is not strict and arbit permutation may also be chosen to name the college.

 

e.g : A.R.M c.o.e, V.G.P c.o.e etc…

 

Now that you have been enlightened about naming an engineering college, three cheers to you in starting one. Don’t forget the royalty though.

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Hear it out… Virtual Barbershop

Courtesy : suraksha

Enjoyed it throughly just check it out. Before you do that, do as she says…

1. Find yourself a good pair of earphones. Headphones work too, but earphones are better.
2. Turn up the volume.
3. Turn your phone off, tell everyone you know not to disturb you for 4 and half minutes.
4. Close your eyes. Be sure to do this – it isn’t half as effective if you don’t!
5. Listen.

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Cutie Pie!!!!

Isn’t he so cuuuuuuuuuuutttttte?…

Thats my nephew!!! Kept me occupied the whole of last weekend!!!

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